Jessica Schrock-Ringenberg said her family fit eight out of the 10 things that define a redneck, according to the list on one of her brother’s T-shirts.

Schrock-Ringenberg, a pastor at Zion Mennonite Church in Archbold, Ohio, revealed her fears to the youth during Wednesday evening worship.

“Physical scars aren’t as easy to cover as emotional scars,” said Schrock-Ringenberg as she described her family growing up in a cinder-block home in Kansas.

At age 13, she started sharing a bed with her mom because her dad threatened to kill her mom.

“It’s not like he’s a drunk or a druggie; he’s just really mean,” she said.

Her freshman year of high school her family kicked her dad out. Finally she hoped the fear would disappear; but it only changed. She compared her story to how the disciples responded to their fear in John 20:19-22. “They did the thing that all of us would have done; they hid,” she said.

Schrock-Ringenberg said she continued to hide her fears. “By the time I reached high school I knew what it would take to survive,” said Schrock-Ringenberg. “I became the person everyone else wanted me to be.”

On the outside she had it all together, but on the inside she was afraid, lonely, miserable and scared to death.

She found ways to cope. At her Mennonite college she titled herself a CK (convict’s kid) when in conversation with PKs (pastors’ kids) or MKs (missionary kids). She thought her weaknesses were unacceptable, but realized her fears held her captive. Just as Jesus led the disciples out of their hiding, she shared that we don’t have to be afraid because we don’t do it alone.

Quoting Morgan Freeman in “Million Dollar Baby,” boxing is an unnatural act. According to Schrock-Ringenberg, following Christ is also an unnatural act, as the Holy Spirit calls us to face our fears and “step into pain.”

“We spend so much time hiding who we are because we are scared of what others will think,” she said.

Schrock-Ringenberg concluded by inviting youth to imagine what the church would look like if its people would no longer be held by fear.

The worship leaders invited youth to write their own fears on mirrors they each received upon entering the arena.

Ken Medema ended the service with an improvised song about facing your fears.